Wednesday, November 26, 2014

Grand Jury Duty 2007

I served on the grand jury in Shelby County, Alabama, in October of 2007. Naturally I was the jury clown. When presented with the list of cases I asked the DA, "Where is the ham sandwich?" Everyone including the DA laughed knowing the reference. When a Sgt from the sheriff's office talked to us about what was going on in the county I asked him, "If I really need you, Sgt, which doughnut shop should I go to?" Everyone including the DA snickered except the Sarge. He looked at me with cold brown eyes and responded, "Call the PD or 911." When I left that day I looked to see if anyone was following me.
By the end of it I knew where every discovered meth lab in the county was.
We returned True Bill in every case except one where the alleged rape victim came to speak to us but after a conversation in the hallway with the DA he came in to tell us that "she's changed her story." In other words, jury, return No Bill.
Indeed, a grand jury would indict a ham sandwich from a competent DA. If a DA desires a indictment he/she will get it. A grand jury will do what the DA wants. At least that was my experience.

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