Comedy Writing

Harold Bloomberg, “The Colgate Comedy Hour”

Well, it was the day I was born, and I’m in the hospital with my mother when Jerry Lewis and Eddie Cantor drop in. They consult some mysterious scrolls, anoint my forehead with oil, look me square in my tiny little baby eye, and say, “Kid, you’re destined to write for ‘The Colgate Comedy Hour.’ We’ll come for you on your eighteenth birthday.” Now, this was 1933, so broadcast television did not exist, and my parents told Jerry and Eddie to take a hike. Fast-forward to 1951 and, like clockwork, those two jokesters show up at my door, tell me I’m hired, and whisk me off to New York City to be a writer. Never saw my mom and dad again.